Focus

Joyous labor was mine to brainstorm, scrutinize and craft each little mom-made treasure for my golden heads. Laying each unique package out on Valentine morning beside the tower of raspberry cream crepes, the craft and delivery was indeed my focus for a time, but after the thank yous are said and they whisk out the door, I'm left with the substance: loving affection for my fold. Love is more important than the tangible gift.
In the middle of stuck inside winter, when the days seem unbearably long and monotonous, I am guilty of focusing on what I want (to avoid the downers) but I error because I miss seeing Jesus--the true answer to my need. I want Jesus to pull me out of this slump but I become so focused on deliverance, I miss the Deliverer.
When I am truly focusing on Jesus, the circumstances will become less important than the eternal Savior. Last Sunday, I heard "Christianity is an on-going call to every day believe in the Word of God." So my prayer must be submitting my spiritual and physical circumstance to God because He has power over the physical and spiritual realm (Colossians 2:15, Hebrews 2:14 Mark 4:39-41) and choose to believe His Word that

..for those who love God all things work together for good, for those who are called according to His purpose. For those whom He foreknew, He also predestined to be conformed to the image of His Son, in order that He might be the first born among many brothers. Romans 8:28-29

He who began a good work in you will bring it to completion at the day of Jesus Christ. Philippians 1:6

Do you believe God is working? He has an endless number of powerful possibilities He may choose to work in your circumstance. Will you focus on what you think you want or on Jesus, the one you need? He is superior to the gift.

Hiding

And they heard the sound of the Lord God walking in the garden in the cool of the day and the man and his wife hid themselves from the presence of the Lord God among the trees of the garden. Genesis 3:8

Relationships are destroyed when we hide. It could be easy to read this verse in Genesis and think, Well, that's silly! You can't hide from God, He sees everything. What were Adam and Eve thinking? But how often do we brush the reality of our sin under a rug and hope God won't deal with it or allow consequence for our sin? And further, how true is this in our interpersonal relationships? Relational intimacy is destroyed when we stop being transparent in our relationships. It happened first in the garden with God and mankind because they were afraid of God (Genesis 3:10).
If a glass jar represented your life, you would have the choice whether or not to let those around you look straight into the jar or to place something around the jar and obstruct other's view into your jar. At a low point in our marriage, the engineer accused me of hiding from him, literally. I was ashamed to be seen by my husband. This was both a physical and and emotional fear and was one of many factors that led to the deterioration of our relationship. When he first pointed this out to me, I denied it. But it was the truth. I had to consciously choose transparency, letting him see inside my jar, both literally and figuratively in order to restore our relationship.
Recently, I became both ugly and confrontational to my compassionate teen who tends to be a picky and inconsistent eater. She had chosen the path of transparency to say she didn't like what I had prepared for her breakfast and instead of grace, I reacted with anger and defensiveness. She had rightly chosen transparency; I chose to not accept and judge her preferences. Later the same day, when she heard that she would be getting a fluoride treatment at the dentist, she (again transparent) chose to wear her anxiety and fear all over her face. I saw straight into her jar. The good in choosing this transparency is that I can respond in grace and pray for her courage and strength. (Though it baffles me how a girl who can't wait to gut a deer with her dad is freaked about a clear substance being smeared across her teeth.) What a gift transparency can be in preserving and restoring a relationship! If she would have stuffed her anxiety inside, I would not have had the privilege of being bonded together with her through prayer.
There is a need to consistently apply transparency to my relationship with Jesus. To be honest, to intentionally search my heart for ways I may have offended, disobeyed or been unfaithful to Him and His ways and then tried to cover the outside of my jar. How often, instead of pulling back the cover from my jar by confessing my sin, experiencing forgiveness and grace in my weakness, do I choose to try forget about it, turn a blind eye or even make excuses (justify) my wrong doing? In doing so, I reject His forgiveness of my sin and His gracious, sufficient power to combat my sinful habits. In essence, I'm just like Adam and Eve, hiding in the garden from God. A relationship spend hiding from someone is no relationship at all. I must consciously choose let God see all that's in my jar.
When was the last time you stopped to look at your life and confess areas you may have been trying to hide from God? In what personal relationship are you withholding truth and honesty? Will you choose to be transparent with God and others?

Choices

Whether I'm opening my "coffee" cupboard at home or standing in front of the menu at the local coffee shop, there are a lot of choices to make in this moment. First off, caffeine or no caffeine? Then, coffee or tea? Iced or hot? Calories or no calories? Cream or no cream? The possibilities abound.

The sorrows of those who run after another god shall multiply; their drink offerings of blood I will not pour out or take their names on my lips.
The Lord is my chosen portion and my cup; You hold my lot.
The lines have fallen for me in pleasant places; indeed, I have a beautiful inheritance. Psalm 16:4-6

The choices I make every day, all day are just that: choices. I don't have to choose Jesus. This world has a lot of other alternatives: pleasure, entertainment, idleness, possessions, money, popularity, vanity, sex, creation...just to name a few.
In the past week, I've been convicted of an irritable spirit toward my family. I'm often harboring a rude sarcastic tone toward them and their choices. I believe the reason why I respond this way is because my eyes are set on me and my selfish preferences. I've created myself to be a little god and I'm choosing me as a god, not the true God. I'm choosing my portion, not God's perfect design and plan for me, not trusting His sovereignty over every area of my life, from the first morning waking to the last bedtime prayer. Verse 4 of Psalm 16 says that running after my own self as a god (or any other worldly god) multiplies my sorrows. In contrast, choosing His portion, results with the pleasant places and the beautiful inheritance from the Lord (verse 6).
Praise God that He's made this choice possible for me, to choose Jesus and His cup for me because of what Jesus did by becoming a man, living a perfect life, dying the death I deserved and giving me a new life. And even now He is living within me and providing me with power to choose His cup over and over again. His cup looks like this when I'm irritated:

Put on then, as God's chosen ones, holy and beloved, compassionate hearts, kindness, humility, meekness and patience, bearing with one another and if one has a complaint against another forgiving each other; as the Lord has forgiven you, so you also must forgive. And above all these put on love, which brings everything together in perfect harmony. Colossians 3:12-14

I need to be reminded when I grab that "coffee" cup to fill in the morning, that my attitude, my focus, my aim for this day is whatever Jesus wants to put in my cup: cleaning up messes, paying the bills, grocery shopping, taxiing golden heads... And while He's pouring the portion in my cup, I can (because of His grace) be compassionate, kind, humble, gentle, patient, forgiving and loving.
The next time you pull up to Starbucks or start the coffee pot in the morning, stop and think about what attitudes and choices you will choose to make today.

God-story

"For I know the plans I have for you," declares the Lord, "Plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." Jeremiah 29:11

I've been putting my heart, soul and mind into believing God's promise. That He's said it and it's done, as I wait for the details to unfold. This is a moment by moment, minute by minute battle of choice.
At this minute, I believe but Jesus, help me with my unbelief (Mark 9:23-25). Not long ago, a cherished friend shared with me the Message paraphrase of Romans 4. It really bears merit for all to stop and read it! This is when I realized, that I can't do the work of the next step in my life. It truly needs to be God's doing, His work, a God-story. Not a SeekingTheMaker-story.
When Jesus rode into Jerusalem on the humble donkey and its colt, the crowds were caught up in a moment of belief that God had sent this man, their Messiah, to save them from the oppression and tyranny of the Romans. They sang, "Hosanna!" Which in Greek literally means, "Save, we pray." They thought they knew God's plan of sending a big hot shot to overthrow the Romans. God had an even bigger plan in mind. Israel thought they needed saving in their external circumstance. God knew they needed spiritual provision and saving, through the perfect, once for all sacrifice for their sins in Jesus' perfect body slain.
I'm just like that. How many times do I shout, "God, save me, give me Your power and guide me out of my external circumstance (a broken down car, an unpleasant moment with the golden heads, disconnect with the engineer, conflict, a decision...)!" But all I really need has already been provided for me: I am in right standing with God through what I believe Jesus did for me on the cross. His sacrifice saved me from eternal torture and death and the grasp of daily sins and sin habits. These are the things from which I really need saving.
But that's not to say God isn't doing something in the midst of my external circumstances. He allows me to experience these so I can practice reaching up to Him and admit that only He can work to make this His story, not mine.
When God promised Abraham he'd have as many descendants as the stars in the sky, it was not given because of something Abraham did or would do. It was based on God's decision to put everything together for Abraham. The fulfillment of God's promise depends entirely on trusting God and His way and then simply embracing Him and what He does.

When everything was hopeless, Abraham believed anyway, deciding to live not on the basis of what he saw he couldn’t do but on what God said he would do. And so he was made father of a multitude of peoples. God himself said to him, “You’re going to have a big family, Abraham!”
Abraham didn’t focus on his own impotence and say, “It’s hopeless. This hundred-year-old body could never father a child.” Nor did he survey Sarah’s decades of infertility and give up. He didn’t tiptoe around God’s promise asking cautiously skeptical questions. He plunged into the promise and came up strong, ready for God, sure that God would make good on what he had said. That’s why it is said, “Abraham was declared fit before God by trusting God to set him right.” But it’s not just Abraham; it’s also us! The same thing gets said about us when we embrace and believe the One who brought Jesus to life when the conditions were equally hopeless. The sacrificed Jesus made us fit for God, set us right with God. Romans 4:18-25, Message

Have you believed in the perfect sacrifice of Jesus' life in place of yours? If so, in what area do you need to quit striving, quit working long and hard and let God do the work to fulfill His promise in your life: good plans, prosperous plans that build a hopeful future. 

Maintenance

Somewhere in the midst of a toddler and preschooler, a wise woman shared with me a systematic lifestyle of maintenance. Every day has its task and if you choose to accomplish these few tasks every day of the week, you won't be overwhelmed by a huge task later. These days, that means the golden heads vacuum (if we're lucky) Mondays and Wednesdays and I do the thorough "mom" job on Fridays. (Not that I always vacuum the corners, but I definitely catch a larger percentage of the popcorn crumbs.) So this Friday, sweep by sweep, I began thinking of the value of maintenance. Not waiting until the house is a complete disaster (which maybe the kitchen floor was) to clean but day by day, task by task, maintaining.
What about spiritual maintenance? How do we maintain our hearts? Not our ministries. Our hearts? How do we maintain our relationship with Jesus?
Having moved a handful of times across the country, I can vouch, if you don't maintain a friendship with regular contact, the relationship will fade.
Ever thinking of my resolution to make this Christmas about Jesus, not cookies, I know that He wants a relationship with you and me. Two truths come to mind: relationships are intentional and relationships take time.

And because of His glory and excellence, He has given us great and precious promises. These are the promises that enable you to share His divine nature and escape the world’s corruption caused by human desires. In view of all this, make every effort to respond to God’s promises. 2 Peter 1:4-5a

"Make every effort," or be intentional! Just as I must choose to pick up the phone and call a friend, I must choose to STOP and spend time with Jesus. With Jesus, our time can look different from day to day. For example, you might be wrapped in a blanket, in the dark and just listening; writing; reading a Bible passage; meditating or memorizing a verse; stopping irritated veins at the dinner table and asking Jesus to see them through His eyes with patience and love. He doesn't box us in!
Susanna Wesley, mother of 19 children, intentionally spent time with Jesus and her children knew it. At random throughout the day, she would toss her apron over her head and when she did, her children knew that she was spending time with Jesus.
At this time of year, no one seems to have enough time as our "to do" lists get longer and longer. Even a relationship with Jesus will take precious time. However,  I am learning from a new friend how I take time for granted. I choose to spend time on things that don't matter, things without eternal significance, even things that will eventually trip me up spiritually. What if we chose to do things that matter? What if we chose relationships over things? If we're honest, I'm pretty sure that we'd agree, we can all make time for Jesus.
Whether at home or within relationships, maintenance is important and it's also a choice. Don't let Jesus be a relationship you let go this Christmas while you move onto baking and shopping.

Engage

Walking through the department store, my pulse quickens in delight. The twinkling lights, Christmas music, the smell of cinnamon and cider, the taste of sugar cookies...I love it! But as I stroll through the store, I question, How do I make this Christmas more about Jesus and less about the cookies and presents? 

At the end of chapter 5 in Hosea's prophecy to Israel, God has made it clear that until His beloved people acknowledge their guilt of walking away from Him and seek Him earnestly, He's going to let them sit in their own heap of a mess. In the onset of chapter 6, it would seem like Israel decides to turn to Him, but light-heartedly in order to get what's in it for them. Like Dennis the Menace when his parents tell him he can sit in the corner until he's sorry for shooting an aspirin down Mr. Wilson's throat with a sling shot. And just like that, suddenly Dennis is "sorry now." But of course, an all-knowing God sees right through fake, phony, insincerity and knows that Israel's turning back to Him is short-lived like a dew that dissipates in the morning heat. God isn't fooled and He wants nothing of the sort. Instead God says,  

I desire steadfast love and not sacrifice; the knowledge of God rather than burnt offerings. Hosea 6:6

Steadfast love means a zeal toward God, an enduring, faithful, lasting love promise with God. God desires an intimate, authentic, consistent relationship with those He created. This is still true today. He sent Jesus to earth so all mankind could know more about who He is and have a relationship with Him because Jesus would pay the price for all our sins if we call Jesus our Lord. 

God's not interested in our attendance at the Christmas Eve service. He's not interested in our money. He's not interested in being our EMT service when we're in a mess and need a quick fix. He's not interested in a once a year confession. He's interested in our loving Him and knowing Him by pursing a relationship with Him.

This is opposite of what the department stores (ready to make a buck) are interested in this year. This is contrary to our culture, caught up in traditions and materialism. This choice will not feel natural. You will feel like you're walking against the current every step of the way. But if it's what your Creator wants most for Christmas, will you do it? Will you choose to engage in relationship with Jesus?

Tough Stuff

Though I may be hard pressed to find last minute Thanksgiving decorations (apparently the stores have moved onto Christmas), the calendar does beckon me to Thanksgiving. All I wanted was little leaf stickers to decorate my Thanksgiving notes...never to be found. I digress.
The writer in me wanted to share something really inspirational about gratitude. Thankfulness. Something thought-provoking. But I'm afraid I've come on the side of Debbie Downer or Negative Nellie.
What I find more thought-provocing these days, most profound is the choice to be grateful for the obstacles in life. The tough stuff. The things I've said before that I'd really just like to forget are happening or have happened in my life. I'm not suggesting that it's great to be stranded on the side of the road with an overheated car, to be in a tail-spin with your husband or be terminated from your job. I'm just wondering, if we put on aerial-view glasses, should we welcome these difficult circumstances because they give opportunities faith to grow?
I woke in the middle of the night with heavy feelings of bitterness. Why at three in the morning did the Holy Spirit see fit to convict me of bitterness toward someone? Because I had to deal with it, that's why. After confessing and pleading with God to change my bitterness into compassion, empathy and prayer, I'm realizing this isn't likely a one-time confession. This is like a wound that needs more consistent dressing changes. Likely for some time, I'll be confessing the bitterness that's emerged (again), thanking God for forgiveness (again) and asking Him to replace those feelings. Ahh, this will be a long road. Shouldn't I be thankful for the long road? Thankful for the opportunity to be right in my relationship with not only this person, but with God?
Though this will be a longer road than I'd like, "the best things are always achieved by the most difficult paths," (Streams in the Desert, pg.429). Don't I want more compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and love, to bear with others and forgive as Christ forgave me (Colossians 3:12-14)? If this is the circumstance I find myself in to practice and learn these virtues, then why wouldn't I choose to say, thanks for conflict?
This Thanksgiving, go deeper than thanking God for family, a home, health... Yes, these are all great gifts from a generous heavenly Father! And will you also choose to thank Him for the opportunities to grow in character and virtue? Will you choose to thank Him for the tough stuff?

What is that?

I like re-dos. Sometimes when a sentence gets said with a wrong attitude or disrespectful tone, I like to give myself or the golden heads a "try that again." I mess up all the time. I'm thankful for the opportunity to do it better the second time.
It's a daily choice, or discipline, to sit quietly before the Lord allowing Him to search my heart and reveal ways I've offended Him, the opportunities for a re-do. Actually, it's not really that much fun. It reveals what I've done wrong, and like most, I don't like being wrong.
This got me thinking about how even confession is a type of trial that builds character, and if I let the Holy Spirit do its work in me, it produces Christ-like character. But what is that tangibly? What was Jesus like as he walked on this earth? One answer is found in what I would consider the most unlikely of places, in what most of us call the "Love Chapter" of the Bible: 1 Corinthians 13. You know, the one read at weddings. What I've realized is that this chapter contains a beautiful list that begins with the value of character, then describes character that builds until we meet Christ and can literally see His every character quality.

I could be the best Teaching Director in all of CBS or writer in all America, but if I don't have Christ-like character, I might as well be a bump on a log. I could have the most awe-inspiring spiritual gifts but if I don't build Christ-like character, I might as well not have any gifts. I could be the most generous giver of all time, serving others with every ounce of my time and resources, but if I don't give and serve with genuine Christ-like character, it's all for nothing.
Christ-like character worth striving for is patient, kind, not jealous, humble, generous, courteous, puts others before myself, forbearing, goes out of my way for others, doesn't hold grudges, believes the best possible outcome about others and always gives the benefit of the doubt. Christ-like character believes and establishes its life on every syllable of God's Word. The person with Christ-like character trusts in God's protection and that God works every detail of their lives out for His glory and their ultimate good, even when she can't know or make sense of all the details.
As I build more Christ-like character, I will be sustained by God and grow more and more consistently in character until I meet Jesus face to face.

I won't perfectly attain these, but I must daily choose to obey the Holy Spirit working out these characterists in me. And when I derail, missing the mark, I'll confess, thanking for forgiveness and allow the Holy Spirit to rule and work these out again. These derailings, these confessions are a part of the adversity that builds Christ-like character.
Spend some time this week rewriting 1 Corinthians 13 for yourself and ask the Holy Spirit to begin working these characteristics out in you.

Forgotten

I'm tired. Exhausted. Worn out. The petunias in my hanging pot describe me well. As my friend said last week, pitch the old annual flowers, "It's time for mums." In contrast to my end-of-summer petunia-like fatigue, I am encouraged that God's enlightenment and truth never needs replacing. It's always vibrant.
Paul has only just got started in his letter to the Ephesians, when he conveys his personal prayer for them: he gives thanks to God for them and asks that God gives them, as a result of being controlled by the Holy Spirit, the opportunity to go deeper in their relationship with Jesus.

..that the God of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of glory, may give you the Spirit of wisdom and of revelation in the knowledge of him, having the eyes of your hearts enlightened, that you may know what is the hope to which he has called you, what are the riches of his glorious inheritance in the saints, and what is the immeasurable greatness of his power toward us who believe... Ephesians 4:17b-19a

What Paul emphasizes is the experiential and practical knowing Jesus, not just a feeling, sense or desire. If you have any history, be it 10 minutes or 10 years walking with Jesus, you have experienced Him, His goodness and His grace. But you may be like me. You may have simply forgotten what's you've experienced!
In my summer fatigue, I've found myself taking on anxiety and I shared this anxiety as a prayer request with a few trusted friends. One friend pointed me to Philippians 4:6 that charges me to present petitions to God with thanksgiving.
Ah...yes! I knew that, I've experienced Philippians 4:7's peace in the past, I had just forgotten! I needed reminding.
The practice of thanksgiving, in my experience with Jesus, is choosing to see, identify and write down my gifts. This has made a huge impact on my life. On one of the hardest days of my life, I was forcing myself through the routine of the morning. The coffee didn't even taste good (no offense Starbucks) and I felt numb. Sitting in my chair with coffee cup in hand, I realized I was forced with a choice: His way or my way. A grateful heart or grieved heart. On that dark day of my life, I chose gratitude. And I continue to choose gratitude. It gets me through the rough days, when I feel like the petunias in August: dried out, leggy and ready to be tossed. My experience with Jesus is always fresh and revitalizing.

Your past is your lens for today. In what way have you experienced Jesus (peace, joy, love, forgiveness...)? Will you share in a comment below? Maybe other readers need to remember what they've forgotten.

True

It was a really great conversation with the compassionate one, never mind I don't even recall the subject. Music plays softly in the background, the rest of the family dozing off while we barrel down the dark highway, somewhere between 55-60 miles an hour and we're just chatting about life. Then in an instant, Bambi jumps up out of the ditch and smacks the front middle of the truck. There was but a half-second to brake.
Thankfully, the damage wasn't severe enough to render the truck undrivable. After removing the dangling plastic parts from the front bumper, the engineer and I returned to the truck and resume the drive home.
While the engineer and everyone else quickly dozed off to slumberland, the silence filled me full of doubt and self-judgment. He probably thinks I'm to blame. I am to blame. I should pay more attention. He's mad at me. He's not talking to me. This is going to be a horrible week. We'll be mad at each other all week... And like I naturally do, I stew. Like my savory garlic rosemary beef stew, anger and resentment stew and grow rich within me.

The eye is the lamp of the body. So if your eye is healthy, your whole body will be full of light, but if your eye is bad your whole body will be full of darkness. If then the light in you is darkness, how great is the darkness! Matthew 6:22-23

Jesus taught these words to the crowds that followed Him. The word eye in this passage means the eye of the mind; the part of the brain that knows something is true and allows you to see or understand more clearly. Now consider the opposite of clearly knowing the truth, it would be believing lies and preventing understanding, leading to withdraw, being concealed and not understanding.
So what I believe and understand either makes me full of light or darkness. If I believe what is true, I am full of light, I'm having a good week. If I believe what if false (a lie), I am full of darkness and I'm having a bad week.
My thought patterns determine the quality of my day. They are the very beginning of my entire outlook and actions. Praise God that something (the Holy Spirit) within me, caused me to stop and perceive truth while driving home that night. The truth is, my poor husband is woke up from sleeping in the car by a big thud. We tend to not think or respond normally when we're woken up from sleep. He did what needed to be done and he went back to sleep. He's tired and there was nothing else to do.
So while everyone else continued their slumber in the truck, I turned off the stew! He's not mad at me. He doesn't judge me or think I'm a bad driver. These things simply happen. And  another truth is praise God that we were in the truck, not the minivan or we likely would be sitting on the side of the road, waiting for a tow truck!
An hour later, nearly home, the engineer wakes up from his car nap. "Why do deer have to be so stupid? These things just happen so fast and there's nothing you can do about it." Clearly, he didn't blame me or think less of me.
I smile, praising God in my heart! He caused me to believe truth, direct my thought patterns and fill me with light.
What lie are you believing today that is filling your entire outlook with darkness, or causing a horrible day (week, year...)? Will you choose to turn off the stew? Ask the Holy Spirit to show you truth in the matter at hand.

Needs

She sat across from me and said, "I have no needs, I used to have lots of needs. Now, I have no needs."

O God, you are my God; earnestly I seek you;
my soul thirsts for you;
my flesh faints for you,
as in a dry and weary land where there is no water.
So I have looked upon you in the sanctuary,
beholding your power and glory.
Because your steadfast love is better than life,
my lips will praise you.
So I will bless you as long as I live;
in your name I will lift up my hands. Psalm 63:1-4

We were made with a need for God, to thirst and long for Him. And we can find Him and be satisfied with Him because He is dependably powerful and He has an unwavering, unstoppable, irrevocable, accepting love toward us. That's want we want: real power and true love. He meets our need.

As we watch the news filled with shootings, stormy weather and political agendas, it's so clear that as a national society, we want power to be just and ultimate security (assuring love.) In our personal lives as well, we want the wrongs made right and we want to feel like we're enough just as we are. We have needs! But the psalmist shows us that not only are we created with needs, we can be satisfied!

My soul will be satisfied as with fat and rich food,
and my mouth will praise you with joyful lips... Psalm 63:5

With You, God, we can be satisfied! When can we be satisfied?

when I remember you upon my bed,
and meditate on you in the watches of the night; Psalm 63:6

This is the hinge verse. Not only is it the literal middle of the psalm, it is what can change our lives: when we choose to recall His faithfulness and channel our thoughts on Jesus. In the painful times: "upon my bed." In the good times when we're wondering when things will go wrong: "in the watches of the night." When we choose this thought pattern, NO MATTER our circumstance, we can sing for joy because we're perfectly protected by our powerful and loving God.

for you have been my help,
and in the shadow of your wings I will sing for joy.
My soul clings to you;
your right hand upholds me. Psalm 63:7-8

What does that look like? I can't tell you how many times I start conversations with God throughout my day: while coloring with the boisterous one, when thinking about the engineer, when I'm ready to moan in the midst of a parenting moment, when making decisions, in a beautiful moment of unity and delight between the golden heads, when my back hurts so badly I can't sleep, when I'm ready to scream because I'm not getting my way. Did you notice these instances include times of need "upon my bed" and "in the watches of the night"? Unfortunately, sometimes I forget to speak to Him. However, He is always available, if we would just approach Him and allow Him to meet our needs. Our need for powerful justice is met by a perfect Judge.

But those who seek to destroy my life
shall go down into the depths of the earth;
they shall be given over to the power of the sword;
they shall be a portion for jackals.
But the king shall rejoice in God;
all who swear by him shall exult,
for the mouths of liars will be stopped. Psalm 63:9-11

If only we would remember that help is possible WHEN we focus on Jesus. All our needs are met beyond expectation: satisfied! It doesn't matter if our future looks awesome or bleak. 

When my grandpa died, I heard of a painful trial in his own life: one of those moments "upon his bed." Apparently, with tight financial times on the farm, Grandpa had began driving truck in addition to farming. One evening, checking in with grandma on the phone, she had to relay to him that there had been a storm and hail had destroyed the crops: their expected farming income gone. I can't imagine what that would feel like to the family provider: sick, gut-wrenching, panic, fear... Likely after some tears and emotions, Grandpa kept driving and turned on the radio to a gospel station and heard truth from the Gaithers. 

The God of the mountain, is still God in the valley.
When things go wrong, He'll make them right.
'Cause the God of the good times, is still God in the bad times.
The God of the day, is still God of the night.

Are you experiencing a day on the mountain or a month in the valley? Are you "upon your bed" in agony and loss or in the watches of the night when things seem alright? No matter your circumstance, where are your thoughts? Are they fixed on Jesus? If they're not, will you choose to look to Him, think of Him, talk to Him and allow Him to satisfy you? Only He can satisfy your needs.

Now

I was ugly. I was impatient. I was irritable. I was frustrated. At the root of it all, I wasn't trusting God. We had looked forward to this day at Valleyfair with the boisterous one since Christmas and the pain shot and pierced from my back to my middle. How would this day look when I couldn't enjoy any attractions and one-on-one moments with my dear child? How long would the day feel if all I did was wait on the bench while she and the engineer went on ride after ride without me? There was so much uncertainty. What if I went on a ride despite my ailment and was left completely debilitated for days?
As I slowly hinged at the waist to tie my shoes, I thought about how I wasn't trusting God's plan for my today, even though I've applauded many obedient believers who have trusted God. I wanted so badly to trust and I know that God is trustworthy, but I couldn't cross that line.
I envisioned gratitude saving my day if I was forced to sit and wait through each ride by myself. I would consciously choose to thank God for every gift: sunshine, leaves, blue hair, smiles, missing teeth, the smell of wet clothes...
On the other side of our day at Valleyfair, I see God's faithfulness and provision. I was able to ride and my back feels none the worse (maybe better). As I confess my bitterness and lack of trust, I realize that truly what matters is trusting God's plan for my now. This ailment has made me realize that

• sometimes God calls my now to be serving others
• sometimes God calls my now to be resting in Him
• sometimes God calls my now to be trusting in His provision.

God told the rebellious Israelites through Isaiah, "In returning and rest you shall be saved; in quietness and in trust shall be your strength," (Isaiah 30:15.) The Israelites were unwilling to return, rest, be still and trust in God's plan for their now (especially when their nation's future seemed so uncertain) and so God let them go to their own demise.
I'm so used to doing. I have a heritage of doing. When you're Dutch, you serve; it's what you do. But this ailment has often denied me the opportunity to do anything (literally). And God, in His generosity toward me, showed me how He loves me through the engineer. My programmed brain believes that if I can serve my husband and if I can do more for him, he'll love me more. Yet, in his constant concern with how I'm feeling, his offered hand of assistance, his consistent meeting my needs and then embracing me when I least expect it and saying, "I love you," when I couldn't do anything, I see that my worthiness of love has nothing to do with what I accomplish. That's how God loves me. I don't have to do anything and He loves me and delights in me even when I can't do anything (Zephaniah 3:17).
I trust He will call me to work for Him again. God's given me a passion and love for serving others, but that may not be His plan for my now.

"O Lord, in the morning you hear my voice; in the morning I prepare a sacrifice for you and watch." Psalm 5:3

I never know how I'm going to feel each morning: could be great, could be awful. But every morning, I can come to Jesus and say, Here I am. Here's my now. I trust in Your plan for my now. And then I watch Him show up.
How is God calling you to trust His plan for your now? Will you choose to rest in the truth that your worthiness of love has nothing to do with what you can accomplish? He simply loves you for being you!

Copy

Cumulus clouds stand out in stark contrast against the intense red sunrise in the northern horizon. Different from the blanket of loose clouds above them, the way these hold their shape and definition captivates my attention. And I ponder, how would I be defined by appearance and externals? I met a lot of new moms yesterday at a field trip with the calculating one and wonder what these women saw in me. How would they describe me? What did they notice about me? It seems what's going on inside a person always finds a way to bubble to the surface (Luke 6:45; Proverbs 4:23).

Rejoice in the Lord always; again I will say, rejoice. Let your reasonableness be known to everyone. The Lord is at hand... Philippians 4:4-5

Let my reasonableness be known to everyone. The NIV translates it gentleness; the NLT: consideration; the KJV: moderation. By definition, it means equitable, fair-minded, gentle. It's greek root words literally translate to copy over. What am I suppose to copy over? I believe it's connected to the next phrase: the Lord is at hand. To show the world what God looks like. He is near, fair, gentle and in control of every detail of my life.

If am conscious of God's sovereign orchestration of all things in my life for His glory and my good, this will be apparent to those around me. And Paul goes on to tell us what this looks like on us:

...do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. Philippians 4:6-7

• Joy, joy, joy, joy
• Absence of anxiety
• Communication with God
• Trust
• Gratitude
• Peace

If these attributes were true of one, that person would stand out against the normal culture of fear, anxiety, selfishness and complaint like the cumulus cloud in my morning sunrise.

But how do I start? Again, Paul does not leave us hanging, he says, start with your thoughts.

Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things. What you have learned and received and heard and seen in me—practice these things, and the God of peace will be with you. Philippians 4:8-9

And so when adversity creeps my way and I'm tempted to chameleon to the world's pattern of complaint and self-centeredness, sirens of alert should be going off in my head. STOP! Change course. I want to stand out against the crowd, I want to copy Jesus. Guard my thoughts. In this particularly challenging situation, what is 

• True
• Honorable
• Just
• Pure
• Lovely
• Admirable
• Excellent
• Worthy of praise?

By choosing to direct my thought patterns, my reasonableness will be known by those around me so they can see what Jesus is like. Jesus is different than the world we live in. He is love, joy, peace, patient, kind, good, faithful, gentle and controlled. I choose to copy Him.
What situation are you facing today that you need to stop and adjust your thought patterns so that what's in your heart beautifully bubbles up to the top and mirrors Jesus to the people in your sphere of influence? 

War within

It's almost bedtime. I'm tired and I finally see the text sent three-hours ago. The message sends waves of disappointment and loneliness pulsing through my veins. Disappointment morphs into anger. Sensing a a fork in my path (one path toward the chocolate and the other to God's rescue) I choose to grab my New Living Translation and nestle into bed by the lamplight with the psalms.
Though it's hard to focus on the meaning and depth of the words, my mind distracted and emotions searing. Yet, these words stand out boldly:

Those who live in the shelter of the Most High
will find rest in the shadow of the Almighty.
This I declare about the Lord:
He alone is my refuge, my place of safety;
he is my God, and I am trusting Him. Psalm 91:1-2

Read and reread but I can't concentrate. I take a bath and try to repeat the words from the verse the best I can, "refuge, safe place, I am trusting Him." This is only half my brain really. Anger had given way to fear and anxiety in a situation I could do nothing about. And I know this is Satan.

God most often appeals to my will by reason.
Satan most often appeals to my emotions. Satan attacks my reason and confuses an issue.  (The Pursuit of Holiness, Jerry Bridges.)

I feel a full out battle raging within me: truth of God vs. the lies of Satan. In retrospect, I had no reason to fear. It wasn't logical to fear. There was no evidence that should lead to fear. Yet, in that moment, the fear and anxiety were so real. Fear smells like Satan's weaponry.
Hot and sweaty from my bath, I return to my bed and reread the words of the Psalm, trying to pray while drifting off to sleep. It's hard to turn off emotions. To choose to echo the true words of the psalmist: God's weaponry.
In the morning, I feel better and I visit with God about what happened. (I have a friend that asks God, "What was that about?") And suddenly I realize though I was home alone that night, I never felt alone. Spiritually, I wasn't alone. God's Holy Spirit was with me the whole time saying, This is the way, walk in it (Isaiah 30:21); Immanuel, God with us (Isaiah 7:14). And I realize that in the morning, my thoughts aren't so muddled. Suddenly my reason returns. God most often appeals to my choices by reason.
The battle was intense. At one crossroad, I choose God's way, yet at another, I fell victim to Satan's emotional attack. Though in the morning, I totally choose God and He responds to my choice in Psalm 91. Read these verses putting your name in the blank. God wants to respond to your choice. 

Because _____ holds fast to me in love, I will deliver her; I will protect _____ because she knows My name. When ______ calls to Me, I will answer her; I will be with her in trouble; I will rescue her and honor her with long life I satisfy _____ and show her my salvation. Psalm 91:14-16

Growing

They've caught the fever: fairy garden fever. The golden heads each want their own and the dollar signs rack up in my mind. How many plants at $4 a piece? For a fairy garden? You can't even eat that! One of the little branches of a minature $4 plant cracks off and I'm wondering if I can sprout that branch and grow another mini plant. It works with most house plants, why not this one? So for about three weeks, I've been nurturing this little stub of a plant, giving it just enough water every day to keep the bottom immersed. Today, I got sick of that little stub and plastic cup in my window sill and tossed it out.
How often do I get frustrated in pursing the fruits of God's presence in my life and just throw those out: love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self control? (Yes, I'm typically tossing self-control and patience out with the trash.) Yet these are evidence of God's residence in my life. Further, I'm suppose to be done with the impatience, anxiety, harshness and living for self-pleasure.

We know that our old sinful selves were crucified with Christ so that sin might lose its power in our lives. We are no longer slaves to sin. For when we died with Christ we were set free from the power of sin. Romans 6:6-7

If I am promised my old ungodly habits have no more power over me, why is it so hard? Why do I have to wait? It seems that when I came to true saving faith and trust in Jesus Christ as my Lord and Savior, the old habits and patterns should have almost instantly vaporized. Like making a bag of microwave popcorn: wait 2 minutes on high power and ding: popcorn's ready. I want ding: no more struggles with sin.
In his book, Pursuit of Holiness, Jerry Bridges explains holiness as a growing process that takes time and I must choose to be committed. I must repeatedly choose to

1. Renew my mind (Romans 12:2)
2. Set my affections on things above (Colossians 3:1)
3. Submit my will to God (James 4:7) (I like to think of this as choosing God's way in all I think say and do.)

As I feel the desire to act according to my old unhealthy habits, I can be saying these Scriptures aloud. Some additional concepts Bridges teaches are also helpful for me.

• God most often appeals to my will by reason.
• Satan most often appeals to my desires.
• Satan attacks my reason and confuses an issue.

I've seen this happen just this week. It was Sunday night, and I had too much for dinner; my stomach was full. But with the kids in bed and knowing "Monday Monday" was around the corner, I began to desire the last bowl of popcorn sitting in the corner of the room. Oh, wouldn't that taste so great? And it's just a little bowl. Oh, and I can sprinkle nuts and M&Ms on top. I deserve it! Tomorrow is Monday. Sitting there I realized, this is Satan appealing to my emotions, my lust for food, and trying to cloud my reason. If I would listen to reason (God's typical method), I'd hear. Hey listen, your stomach is so full it still hurts from dinner. The popcorn will be there tomorrow. 
Another helpful arrow in my armor I heard this week is to envision God's glory in the midst of attack. In my mind, begin to imagine heaven and it's perfection and wonderfulness and think, I want to be there! And even though this struggle with sin and temptation is hard, I want that more.
The truth is sometimes I win this battle in my mind and sometimes I don't. No, it's not like the bag of microwave popcorn, but more like that little fairy plant that takes weeks and weeks to sprout new roots. This process will be on-going until the day I meet Jesus face to face. It's part of my journey. But I don't do it alone.

Now may the God of peace himself sanctify you completely, and may your whole spirit and soul and body be kept blameless at the coming of our Lord Jesus Christ. He who calls you is faithful; he will surely do it. 1 Thessalonians 5:23-24

He provides the power within me, in the Holy Spirit to make choices, daily, hourly choices that look like Jesus. I can expect growth as I make wise godly choices. So, like the cabbage and cucumbers that I haven't given up on, I'll be growing.

"Christ"mas

It keeps reverberating in my head, Pastor Bruce’s question in his first Advent sermon this year, “How do you keep materialism out of Christmas?”

We went Black Friday shopping as an extended family outing. It did not bode well for my first-grader. She kept wanting everything and we kept saying, “Well, Christmas isn’t far away. We’ll add it to your list. You can’t have that (or that, or that or that) today.” Toward the end of the outing, she was moping alongside her shopping grandma when she said, “I just see all this stuff and I want it all. I know I shouldn’t feel that way.” Christmas in America creates a mentality of materialism.

Along with materialism, how do we not get caught up in the chaotic preparations for celebrating? As Christ-followers, how do we remember to dwell with Jesus, the “Christ” in Christmas?

Visiting with a friend after church last Sunday, she shared her experience of being miserably sick with the flu last Christmas. She expressed that all the things she had to do went undone and Christmas still happened. And she still experienced joy.

For thus said the Lord God, the Holy One of Israel, ‘In returning and rest you shall be saved; in quietness and in trust shall be your strength.’  Isaiah 30:15

In this verse, we see how we might save Christmas from materialism and chaos. By sitting, with coffee cup and Bible in hand, resting in Jesus. In stopping daily to confess my mess-ups to Jesus. Driving in silence; talking and listening to God instead of the radio. In making a to-do-list but verbally telling God that I trust He will allow me to accomplish exactly what He desires for this day. By prioritizing Jesus, not things, stuff, events or my infamous “to do list.” (Someone please tell me I’m not alone with my lists…) By choosing to stop your family once a day and read an Advent devotional (or any Scripture). Through our example, those in our sphere of influence (family, friends and neighbors) will see the Christ in Christmas, not the materialism or busyness.

Are you prioritizing Christ in Christmas? How will you choose to return and rest this December?

Layers

And without faith it is impossible to please Him, for whoever would draw near to God must believe that He exists and that He rewards those who seek Him. Hebrews 11:6

There are two "ands" in Hebrews 11:6. The first begins the sentence as a term conclusion. It refers to what the writer of Hebrews was speaking in verse 5: Enoch. A man we meet in Genesis, who walked with God or pleased God. Moses makes note of Enoch's pleasing walk with God two times, so we shouldn't make light of it.

When Enoch had lived 65 years, he fathered Methuselah. Enoch walked with God (Septuagint: pleased God) after he fathered Methuselah 300 years and had other sons and daughters. Thus all the days of Enoch were 365 years. Enoch walked with God (Septuagint: pleased God) and he was not for God took him. Genesis 5:21-24

So Enoch pleased God or walked with God in God's ways, and remember that without confidence in God's ability to draw us up out of sin, it is impossible to delight Him. Enoch had confidence in God's ability to save him from sin that leads to death.

The second and: "And God rewards those who seek Him." To seek Him is an active verb that means to seek out, search for, investigate, scrutinize, beg, crave, to demand back or require. It seems like there's another layer to delighting God. When we go beyond accepting His offer to draw us up and wipe us clean, and choose to actively investigate Him; look for Him and His ways; crave Him; beg, need and require God's presence.

Driving in the truck, blinker had shorted out and was not working. This has been an on-going quirk for which I've found a "bandaid solution": don't move the steering wheel column. I was instantly upset; the engineer had moved the steering wheel position. Simultaneously, I knew I wanted to respond to this frustration in God's way (not in my anger). So I took a deep breath, God, help me to not be angry at him for moving the steering wheel, and just like that, the steering wheel locked into the correct position for the blinker to work consistently. I was shocked that God immediately answered my prayer. It wasn't until later that I realized that I didn't pray that God would fix my problem, I prayed that God would give me the power to act in His way of patience and forbearance.  "He rewards those who seek Him."

Don't get me wrong, every day I confess areas where I fail miserably at seeking Him and have walked far down my own path navigating life; anger, bitterness, self-righteousness, hardness, selfishness, doubt in His plan... But choosing His way for my life is rewarding, both immediately and eternally. Accepting His gift of righteousness through His generous offer (Isaiah 1:18) and then consistently choosing His way is what brings God most delight and gives us a secure eternal future in heaven and abundant, full, satisfying life now.

If you've accepted His offer, spend some time contemplating what path you're walking on: yours or His? It's never to late to turn around and get on His highway of righteousness.

Please

As we sat around the Thanksgiving feast, the golden heads pointed out that the table (passed down from their great grandma) was leaning. Acknowledging the antique, my mother-in-law said, "Yeah, I should have taken up my mom on her offer to buy me a new dining room set." She had confidence in her mother's ability and desire to purchase a new dining set, but she didn't accept. God's offer, though much more significant, is free to us, desired by Him and all we need to do is say yes.

And without faith it is impossible to please Him, for whoever would draw near to God must believe that He exists and that He rewards those who seek Him. Hebrews 11:6

Believing in God's plan to rescue us from death through Jesus' death on the cross is the only way to please God. The greek for please is euarestéo, which means to gratify completely. If we break this greek word apart, we get eu (to be well off, prosper) and airó (to raise, elevate, draw up). Looking deeply into airó, we get the picture of God drawing us up out of death and sin and making us completely clean, separated from all sin. And this is what makes him well off, tickles His fancy or delights Him: to draw us up out of our filth! Do you catch the irony here? We don't do anything; we simply believe He is the one true God that has a plan to save us. It delights God to pick me up and polish me until I shine, and He does all the work. Can you imagine if the only way my mother-in-law could delight her mother was if she said, "Yes, get me that new dining set,"?

"Come now, let us reason together," says the Lord. "Though your sins are like scarlet, they shall be white as snow; though they are red like crimson, they shall become like wool." Isaiah 1:18

Completely non-sensical! God says, "Here, give me all you have, are and will ever do wrong and I'll give you perfection." My only part is to have faith, trust, confidence assurance in His ability to do this. He offers and all I need to do is say yes. In our economy of you get what you pay for, this seems too good to be true.

If you've never accepted God's offer to lift you up and take your filth, spend time in conversation with Him. He wants to be generous with you. I beg you to take Him up on it. There's no other way to enter His presence and gratify Him completely. 

Anchor

The more I know Jesus, the more I realize that the outcome of my life is a choice. And in the dark morning hour, He gave me a vivid contrast of choices: an anchor or waves. Doesn’t life brew some choppy waters? But we can choose an anchor. Jesus can be our anchor so we don't just get tossed along.

On that day, when evening had come, He said to them, “Let us go across to the other side.” And leaving the crowd, they took Him with them in the boat, just as He was. And other boats were with Him. And a great windstorm arose, and the waves were breaking into the boat, so that the boat was already filling. But He was in the stern, asleep on the cushion. And they woke Him and said to Him, “Teacher, do you not care that we are perishing?” And He awoke and rebuked the wind and said to the sea, “Peace! Be still!” And the wind ceased, and there was a great calm. He said to them, “Why are you so afraid? Have you still no faith?” Mark 4:35-40

I've never noticed that little phrase tucked in verse 36: "(the disciples) took (Jesus) with them in the boat, just as (Jesus) was." We can't know exactly what that implies, but looking at the entire situation, we know Jesus had just been teaching large crowds on the shores of the Sea of Galilee, likely for days. And that immediately following getting in the boat, He fell asleep. I conclude that Jesus was tired and He chose rest.
Do you sometimes feel tired? One child has the flu (which they share with everyone else in the family) the week you need extra time to prepare for a big presentation. Several unpleasant meetings at work, along with an unending inbox of emails and family demands. Three different activities, in three different cities on one night. Dishes piled in the sink, an empty pantry, sticky messes on the floor and laundry baskets overflowing. It’s so easy to get pulled into the storm. It’s what naturally happens. But we weren’t meant to constantly strive like the disciples in that storm on the sea of Galilee. Jesus had that storm under control. He has your storm under control and He’ll control the next one too. Take a lesson from Jesus and rest.

Be still (cease striving) and know that I am God! Psalm 46:10a

When the disciples went to Jesus in the middle of the storm, I notice two big things. First, Jesus rebuked the storm. If the root of the storm is symbolic of Satan, then we know the waves or chaos of life aren't the enemy, Satan is. Satan is using any means possible to separate us from Jesus, so he will tempt us, distract us and attack us with the busyness of life. Jesus has overcome the Satan and God's given us everything we need to stand against Satan's schemes. Second, I think there is a parallel between when the waves calm down and when the disciples stop trying in their own power to fight the storm. When we stop fighting and put down our Anchor (focus on Jesus), there is a calm.
So how do you rest like Jesus? As soon as you wake, talk to God. Tell Him Psalm 46:10a, "God, today, I am stopping striving and choosing to rest in You because You have this day under control." The more you choose to dialogue with Him through your day, the more opportunities you’ll have to choose His way of rest. When the storm is rough, stand firm and see that Satan's trying to use your crazy day to pull you away from the rest Jesus intends you to have. Choose the Anchor that gives rest.

My Advisor

Jesus is my good advisor; I have all I need and desire nothing more than His presence in my life.
Jesus makes me sit still in His abundant power (not my own strength),
He brings me rest, quiet and comfort in a foul, chaotic, fast-paced world.
He refreshes my soul like hot coffee in the early morning.
Jesus covers a battered, tattered me with His perfection because it delights Him and brings applause to His deserving Name: Jesus.

When my life becomes burdened, busy and miserable,
I don't have to worry,
for Jesus is with me;
His written Word and its instruction bring me hope and comfort when I choose to follow them.

Jesus gives me as much love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control as I could ever want, like a Thanksgiving Day feast.
This is all within my grasp while Satan watches and scowls because He can't have me;
No instead I have all the resources I need for a full, rich, meaningful life.
Only good gifts and undeserved favor will describe my life,
when I choose to live my life in Jesus' advisory office.
Psalm 23, paraphrase

Is Jesus your advisor? "[Satan] comes only to steal and kill and destroy. [Jesus] came that we might have life and have it abundantly." John 10:10. Choose abundance!