Overwhelmed

I am easily overwhelmed. Overwhelmed by something trivial like a packing list or huge like God's direction for the next phase of my life. "I know, it's ridiculous! This is small fries; seriously, who really cares that we don't have that birth certificate? Why do I get so overwhelmed?"
So silly! God is present and directs me in the big stuff, the simple stuff, the mundane stuff and the tough stuff. It's so straight and simple in Psalm 23: the "big fries" are eternity. And if that's secure, seriously, everything else is small fries.

Surely, goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life and I shall dwell in the house of the Lord forever. Psalm 23:6

Forever! Nothing changes this. Forever compared to the checkbook not being balanced is like, "Who cares about the checkbook?" Forever compared to should I write a book is like, "Well, whatever about that book." Forever compared to how does God want to shape our family, is like, "Either way, heaven's your destination."
Don't get me wrong, decisions are real but I don't need to fret or manipulate the situation. Wherever I go and whatever I do, God is actively working and directing my steps. I'm reminded of beautiful Sarah of the Old Testament. She was all worked up about God's promise to her hubby, Abraham: "Count the stars if you can. That’s how many descendants you will have!” Sarah responds by thinking logically, What? I'm getting older and still no baby, better take matters into my own hands. Here honey, have babies through my maid Hagaar. (And that didn't go well. Read the details here.) How often am I just like Sarah, worrying and trying to manipulate the situation, to work it out the best I can?

Trust in the Lord completely and don't depend on your own reasoning and stellar planning skills. Proverbs 3:5, my paraphrase

God will work and fashion for His good purpose in His perfect timing. Just breathe. Keep taking a step at a time. Keep eternal perspective. Sometimes it does matter next year, sometimes it doesn't. Just remember the big fries: eternity.

And this is the testimony, that God gave us eternal life, and this life is in His Son. Whoever has the Son has life; whoever does not have the Son of God does not have life. I write these things to you who believe in the name of the Son of God that you may know you have eternal life. And this is the confidence that we have toward Him, that if we ask anything in His will He hears us. 1 John 5:11-14

There was a young boy who went with his mother to see the premier pianist of his time. As they waited for the concert to begin, the boy's mother was visiting with another mother and the young boy walked up on the stage and began plunking out "Chopsticks" on the grand piano. The audience was aghast and quickly many set to work to remove the boy from the stage. Yet out came the pianist and said to the boy, "That was beautiful! Please keep playing." And as the boy did, the pianist placed his seasoned hands around the young boy's and created a rich, beautiful, full sound that filled the orchestra hall. We are like that little boy, plunking out the rhythms God calls us to: laundry, cleaning, your day job, washing the car, haircuts... These are small fries but the Holy Spirit comes alongside us to make these small, seemingly insignificant tasks and make them shine the light on Jesus. We may never know how our smile or tip made the day of the hairdresser. We may never realize that our act of service for our children allowed them to encourage a friend or allowed them time to pursue a masterpiece of art for the Creator.
All we're called to do is obediently plunk out the melody of what He calls us to do each day. He will take our small fries and make them great in His time, in His will, according to His pleasure. He's promised us big fries. So oh my heart, don't fret the small fries.

Write

Indulge me. I've just been prayed over by a Nigerian momma in broken English and her native tongue, and celebrated my 23-year old Nigerian immigrant neighbor securing her first job. My first reaction: write this moment down.

Since obtaining Social Security documents to work in the United States a month ago, I've listened to her apply for numerous jobs, transportation consistently the obstacle in the interview stage. Less than a week ago, she asked, "C-H-I-P-O-L-T-E, you know the place in Apple Valley?" I agreed to drive her to the interview. Then the second interview. Then the third. Every journey, leery of serving and loving in a non-beneficial way.Yet between my ears reverberate, Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as if working for the Lord, not men (Colossians 3:23), and Your labor in the Lord is not in vain (1 Corinthians 15:58).  

And now the celebration and unexpected blessing. I feel affirmed and in the center of His will for my days. I'm thankful to write. The opportunity to look back and recall His hand.

I will bless the Lord who guides me;  even at night my heart instructs me. I know the Lord is always with me. I will not be shaken, for he is right beside me. Psalm 16:7-8

Record the Lord's guidance and instruction in your life.

Life

In my hiker opinion, there's a difference between just strolling along a path you see from the highway and getting out the map, consciously choosing a destination and then planning the trail route. In both instances, you might see some pretty neat things, but likely the routed path will yield more spectacular views. But the extra work of planning the excursion is a choice.
Rewind four-thousand years to Moses leading Israel through the desert recorded in Deuteronomy 30.

15 “Now listen! Today I am giving you a choice between life and death, between prosperity and disaster. 16 For I command you this day to love the Lord your God and to keep his commands, decrees, and regulations by walking in his ways. If you do this, you will live and multiply, and the Lord your God will bless you and the land you are about to enter and occupy.17 “But if your heart turns away and you refuse to listen, and if you are drawn away to serve and worship other gods,18 then I warn you now that you will certainly be destroyed. You will not live a long, good life in the land you are crossing the Jordan to occupy.19 “Today I have given you the choice between life and death, between blessings and curses. Now I call on heaven and earth to witness the choice you make. Oh, that you would choose life, so that you and your descendants might live! 20 You can make this choice by loving the Lord your God, obeying him, and committing yourself firmly to him. This is the key to your life. And if you love and obey the Lord, you will live long in the land the Lord swore to give your ancestors Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob.”

Israel had a choice on the quality of their life. It was irrevocable that they were a people chosen and called by God (Deuteronomy 7:6-9) and they were undoubtedly in His flock, but the quality of their life was determined by their choice: life and prosperity or death and disaster.
We have the same choice. When we choose to believe in the work of Jesus paying the penalty of my sin on the cross, we are choosing to accept eternal life and enter into His flock. After that initial choice, comes the daily choice: to love my LORD, follow His ways in all I think, say and do, and hold fast to Him (verse 20).
This is the key to living a full, meaningful, rich life because He is my life. After our initial choice to accept eternal life, our old life is buried, dead and gone (Galatians 2:20). He is my length of days. The quality of my today depends on my choice to love, follow and hold onto Jesus. This is the difference between living a ho-hum life as a believer (a pitiful existence) and living with purpose and joy. Some people say choose your attitude, I say choose LIFE!
Deliberately choose a trail on the map, don't just mosey on down whatever path is laid before you because that path will not be satisfying! To not consciously choose is to choose the unsatifsying life.
Every day when you come before God, picture Him like Moses before Israel, asking you, "Will you choose good or evil?" And just like Moses pleaded with Israel, He pleads with you to choose life.
Will you consciously choose life today: to love God, follow His ways and hold onto Him as your surety?

Compelled

Lying in bed. It's four o'clock in the morning. I can't fall back to sleep. My mind begins. If I wake up now, I'd have plenty of time to study the Bible, finish that chapter, write in my blog, enjoy coffee, get a good workout… Golly I hope I don't fall back to sleep, that sounds like fun.
We are simply compelled to do some things. (Things that seems crazy to others.) 

 For preaching the Good News is not something I can boast about. I am compelled by God to do it. How terrible for me if I didn’t do it. (1 Corinthians 9:16, NLT)

Paul is compelled to preach the gospel. It’s the passion God gave him and it keeps him up at night. It is not his own will, but God's design for his life. To not preach for Paul would have been to live his life in vain or emptiness because he’s not accomplishing God’s intended purpose for his life

Suddenly, at 6:04 in the morning, I understood that word. I am compelled to wake up early. I jokingly call it "my own time." But maybe it's a God-given compulsion. It equips me and seriously, "woe to me" if I don't take it. (And woe to my family as well.)
God-given compulsions will always align with God's Word and will likely be an act of love, service or relationship.
There are other things we're compelled to do. Friends who felt compelled to sell everything they own, pack up their families and fly across the globe to share Jesus by building relationships with those in other countries. Sometimes we're compelled for the long-term missions. Sometimes we're compelled for the short-term missions: a ten-day mission trip, filling shoe-boxes for Operation Christmas Child, bless someone financially, or encourage someone with a phone call or note... When your compulsion is God given, it doesn't just go away after a good-night's sleep. It'll wake you in the middle of the night, keep you up at night or wake you before long before the sunrise. Better to act on your compulsion: your God-given mission. To step out in faith and trust for God's provision and act! This is what God's designed you for.

For we are His workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand, that we should walk in them. Ephesians 2:10

What are you compelled to do? What steps of faithfulness will you take today to answer God's work designed for your life? The reward will be exhilarating: when God says to you, "Well, done my good and faithful servant."

Nets

"Follow me, and I will make you become fishers of men." And immediately they left their nets and followed him. Mark 1:17

 The ESV adds become in its translation, indicating an future process of change or growing. The disciples weren't yet fishers of men, but would be transformed into what Jesus' will was for them and Jesus would do the work (I will make). Jesus did the fashioning, molding or transforming in his disciples in New Testament times and is molding you and me now if we follow him. Our action of following comes first.

And immediately Jesus left the synagogue and entered the house of Simon and Andrew, with James and John. Now Simon's mother-in-law lay ill with a fever, and immediately they told him about her. And he came and took her by the hand and lifted her up, and the fever left her, and she began to serve them. Mark 10:29-31

Simon had a mother-in-law, so we infer that he was married. Simon left more that just his nets, to follow Jesus; he left his family for a time (or maybe his family followed Jesus and his disciples.) This rocked me. If Jesus calls the engineer to do a completely time-consuming ministry in which Jesus would work through him and the engineer had to leave our family for days and weeks to become what Jesus intends, I would have a really hard time accepting God's will. I have always held tightly to keeping family before or above ministry on the priority list. This revelation of family in Scripture reminds me to hold loosely. However, I am comforted: Jesus showed up at Simon's house and healed Simon's mother-in-law. Jesus cares about families and will take care of them, providing for all their needs. I'm sure he'd do this even if Jesus hadn't physically walked into the home. He is an omnipresent God. I wonder what the perspective would be from Simon's wife. How many stories would she have of how God provided, cared and healed their family while she was "holding down the fort" during Simon's following?
A day after my pondering, the blue Jays moved in. In my office, I look out a window overlooking the boisterous one's rainbow flower garden. At first I noticed just one blue jay, then realized it was a whole flock. I had never noticed a blue jay in my yard prior to this, so it really grabbed my attention. I wondered why they had moved in and then I recalled the sunflowers she had planted. Food: the blue jays were after the sunflower seeds. Remember that movie, Field of Dreams and that famous voice in the corn field: "If you build it, they will come," ? Suddenly in my head is the phrase, "If you feed them, they will come."
Mark chapter one: fishers of men. If you feed them (literally as Jesus did feed the 5000+ and then 4000+ and figuratively feeding spiritually), they will come. Read through any gospel account, people flocked to him! When they follow, God's Word and Holy Spirit will do the work to transform them.
In the middle of preparing my teaching on 1 Corinthians 3, I see the parallel. Our class membership attendance has fallen from last year. But if follow (and leave my nets) he will make me become fisher of men. And if I feed them, they will come.
Since my calling, I've had the hardest time leaving my nets: my family. Just a day prior, the boisterous one ran off the school bus and asked, "You're coming to my fall walk, aren't you?" In fact, I had not volunteered for this field trip. Intentionally, this was an act of leaving my net. And even now as I work on my teaching, watching the blue jays, her look of devastation rips my heart in two. I know I'm called to teach right now but I'm feeling guilting about "leaving" my family. Knowing I'm following Him, I press on in my study and preparation.
A while later, I indulge in the last piece of Dove dark chocolate from Valentine's Day. (It is fall but, chocolate keeps, right?) I don't believe in horoscopes but I do believe God speaks to us in sometimes bizarre ways. Inside the chocolate foil is a message: "You are exactly where you are suppose to be." Not on a field trip, but parked in God's Word preparing for teaching. So I resolve to do the work God has called me to for this season and allow him to provide and care for my family as I follow.

"For we are His workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand, that we should walk in them." Ephesians 4:10

You have a mission you are called to for Christ. What is your "net" right now? Practice flexing your trust muscles and leave your "net" to walk following Him.

Will

Tears welling up in her eyes, the calculating one stares at me with betrayal. "I'm so sorry honey, this is not how mommy wanted this day to look either, but you have to be brave and do this yourself right now." Dashing out the door to play practice, I couldn't find the keys. Assuming both pairs were in the car with the engineer at work, neighbor Stephanie saved the day, but needed her car back in 20 minutes: ten minutes to get there and ten to return left no escort service into the first day of practice. As we rushed home, I prayed, "God, I don't understand why this day couldn't have looked more smooth, polished and beautiful." And in my heart, I know His reply, This is My will for you; nothing happens outside My plan. So aloud, I echo, "Yet, this is Your will for me. What in the world do you want me to learn from this?"

Therefore, my beloved, as you have always obeyed, so now, not only in my presence, but much more in my absence, work out your own salvation with fear and trembling for it is God who works in you, both to will and to work for His good pleasure. Philippians 2:12-13

And we know that for those who love God all things work together for good, for those who are called according to His purpose. Romans 8:28

We must accept every circumstance as God's will for us; as His tool to refine me, teach me, train me and make me more holy. It is my will that I need to bend toward His.
Sometimes circumstances are funny and simply embarrassing. Without the sugar coating, they can be hard, almost impossible: death. Or difficult: When miles separate you from someone who needs you, choosing to respond in anger (sin) to other's perceived sin, assigned a task without all the tools, last minute changes... This is when we need to choose to lay ourselves down, to be like Christ: humble, submissive, self-surrendered.
After thanking Stephanie for the use of her car, with two remaining goldenheads in tow, we returned home to resume laundry. There sitting on the dryer, was the set of keys I assumed were in the engineer's car. Ah...humility and stopping. That's what I needed taught. I needed to come clean with my girls, Stephanie and the engineer. I needed to stop trying to get things done so quickly. I made the mistake. I did something totally stupid. Me. No one else. And even though we laugh about it now, sometimes the little, silly instances remind and encourage us amidst the big, tough stuff.
Next time your circumstances don't align with your plan, pray. Accept that is is God's will for you and ask what He wants to accomplish or teach you through this seeming curve ball.

Little

A list of "Kitchen Rules" hangs visibly from our dining table. Lately, the boisterous one (consistent with her title) has loved announcing she's the "only one" following the rules: kissing the cook, washing her hands… Exasperated, the compassionate one lets her have a mouthful over breakfast yesterday. Broken hearted with crocodile tears, the boisterous one runs to her room. I convince the compassionate one that maybe we need to comfort the boisterous one, confess and ask forgiveness for being a bit brash. As we communicated, I heard, "I feel like no one likes me…no one follows me….what I do isn't as important as what anyone else does." A two-by-four smacks my forehead: as a middle, I don't have a clue what it's like to be the youngest in the family.
I have been amazed lately at my "baby" of the family. She is the most consistent in doing her chores (and rarely complains…just does it with a beautiful heart and smile), self-sufficient in most areas, learning through osmosis, creative and serves others. There is something particular about this one. I think about the "Kitchen Rules," and realize she's being obedient in the tasks God places before her: kissing the cook, emptying the dishwasher, learning to add, making gifts or entertaining herself.
This reminded me of David. He was youngest or smallest son of Jesse. He was responsible for taking care of the sheep, traveled back and forth to serve Saul as his armor bearer and play his lyre, obedient to his father's commands, inquisitive, offended that anyone would defy the God of Israel, defends the name of Israel and is successful in all his endeavors. David appears to be faithful to the tasks and positions God calls him. Except for God, who chose David to be Israel's king, and Samuel who anointed him, those around him have other opinions of the young man. David's oldest brother (and possibly others) were jealous of him, his enemy, Goliath, taunted him and Saul hated him.
Despite David's opponents, he was faithful and obedient to what God called him to do. These seemly small acts of obedience led to his call of greatness: Israel's greatest king.
What acts of obedience is God calling you to be faithful in pursuing today?

He has told you, O man, what is good;
and what does the Lord require of you
but to do justice, and to love kindness,
and to walk humbly with your God. Micah 6:8

Maybe he's calling you to play with your kids, do the laundry, balance your checkbook, finish up that project at work, or bake a plate of cookies for the neighbors. Walking in obedience to the tasks placed before you leads you is the plan God has for you. In obedience, you are always in the center of His will. Though these seem like menial tasks, if God can trust you to be obedient in small tasks, He may choose later to call you to bigger tasks.

His master said to him, 'Well done, good and faithful servant. You have been faithful over a little; I will set you over much. Enter into the joy of your master.' Matthew 25:23

Take a moment to think about what God calls you to do today. Is it just, kind and consistent with Scripture? Then do it!

Run away

Physically fatigued, driving through heavy snow and traffic, the battle raged in my head. Wipers and defrost on high and struggling to see, Satan echoes in my mind, "You can't do this. You can't even get there. A leader in Bible Study has to live closer and be physically available. You're not committed to this Bible Study, you want to turn around and go home." Lies. Deep inside, I know these are lies but I can't quite shake the doubt that I'm not the right person for this ministry.

Safely arrived and listening to shared insight and revelations from the Lord, Satan taunts again, "You don't know anything compared to everyone else here. You are not qualified to lead. Others are more equipped than you." Struggling to focus on the discussion, I acknowledge these are Satan's lies, and turn my mind to what is true, honorable, right..(Philippians 4:8.) What do we do when the lies we hear contradict what we believe God has told us? Two things: recall and seek again. We prayed about the call to serve in leadership; believers affirmed me, God opened doors, His Word and Spirit affirmed. Still, the doubt. Can you relate? Have you ever pounded your head against the wall saying, I can't do this? The kids are whining and demanding. The deadline has come and gone; your company and personal reputation are on the line. Showtime is in ten minutes and you're not prepared. I can't do this.

Opening my Bible after a good night's rest, I am again amazed at how His mercies are new every morning (Lamentations 3:22-23). This is seeking again.

Seek the Lord and His strength,
Seek His presence continually. 1 Chronicles 16:11

It is not your own strength that can accomplish the tasks to which He calls you. His strength through you is sufficient. Your inadequacies cause you to rely on His strength.

For is who is God except the Lord?
And who is a rock, except our God?
God is my strength and power
and He makes my way perfect. 2 Samuel 22:32

He is solid, dependable and unbreakable. There is no task you cannot face without Him within you. He is within you when you believe in Christ, God's perfect Son sent to earth to offer His life for your wrong doing. You get so much for so little. 

When you accept the roles and position He calls you to, whether it be motherhood, leadership at work, in the community or church, and then obey His commands you will be equipped.

ACCEPT + OBEY = EQUIPPED

After you say "yes" to the road He places before you, comes the obedience. You have to be completely yielded to Him and available for God to work through you. When you experience success, He gets the glory. When you face a road block, you know He will work a miracle and if He doesn't, He's directing you somewhere else. We are all created with a sinful nature. We want our own way. We need Him to remove our heart of stone and give us His heart.

Whatever God calls you to, He wants you to serve Him through that ministry. 

Regard us as servants of Christ and stewards of the mysteries of God. Moreover, it is required of stewards that they be found trustworthy. 1 Corinthians 4:1-2

Merriam-Webster defines a stewards as "a person whose job is to manage the land and property of another person." God trusts you to manage His land and property with the tasks He puts before you. This is your ministry. Do those you minister to also trust you? In Jesus' parable of the talents, the master applauds those who are faithful with a little and rewards them with more to manage (Matthew 25:21, 23).

It seems surreal to me that God has placed in my heart such a deep desire to know Him more and His Word. To wake up in the morning, wondering, "What is He going to teach me today?" This seems unnatural. I would have never imagined myself like this five-years ago. I don't know why God has called me to write. He keeps affirming me in it though through His Spirit, people and circumstances. I felt like the Spirit called me to write every week this year. Discipline is super-natural! I am not super-natural, but Christ in me is. I could runaway from the ministry He has placed before me, but He trusts me to be available to do it through me.

Listen to the song by Waterdeep and let the lyrics be a conversation with God.

I could run away 

But You would never leave 

You would always stay 

Right by my side 

Everything I've ever wanted 

I've found in you 

And I need you, Oh I need you 

Every step of the way