I am...: March 2015

They were waiting for a cold spring day fit for the movies. Sunday's chill and forecast for snow fulfilled their desire. Captivated by Cinderella, even mom as enthralled. Let's get this right, her name was Ella. When her step-sisters and step-mother find her with ash from the fire's cinders on her face, they taunt her by calling her "cinder"Ella. When all is revealed and the Prince finds the mystery princess and begs her name, I was appalled when she answered, "My name is Cinderella!" I wanted to stand up and shout, "That's not who you are! You are Ella!" I resisted the urge, for the sake of my family's embarrassment.
Mark Driscoll taught, "Your past might explain you, but it doesn't define you."
Define means to explain or identify the nature or essential qualities of; to describe. My past is not who I am.
I spent some time before bed, looking through my childhood, wedding and early years of our family scrapbooks, pondering what from my past do I let define me? As I pondered, I thought about the daily path I walk as a mom, a wife, a leader; the struggles and battles each role has attached. My thoughts poured onto my weakness, misgiving, faults and strains. And then I realized, not only does my past experience not describe me, my present circumstances do not identify me. Only my standing with Christ defines me. Who am I?

I am forgiven of all my sins (past, present and future.)

And you who were dead in your trespasses and the uncircumcision of your flesh, God made alive together with him, having forgiven us all our trespasses, by canceling the record of debt that stood against us with its legal demands. This he set aside, nailing it to the cross. Colossians 2:13-14

I am a child of the King.

See what kind of love the Father has given to us, that we should be called children of God; and so we are. 1 John 3:1a

I am secure, He will never reject me.

All that the Father gives me will come to me, and whoever comes to me I will never cast out. John 6:37

I am a temple of the Holy Spirit.

Or do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit within you, whom you have from God? 1 Corinthians 6:19

I am never alone.

And I will ask the Father, and he will give you another Helper, to be with you forever.. John 14:16

I am new (not fixed up).

If anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation. The old has passed away; behold, the new has come. 1 Corinthians 5:17

I am given eternal life now!

And this is eternal life, that they know you, the only true God and Jesus Christ, whom you have sent. John 17:3

When I sat down with my scrapbooks, I felt heavy, burdened, distressed, not so much by my past, but my present. After God spoke to my soul, I felt lighter, lifted. It just took reminding and listening.

Will you approach God with your "scrapbooks"? What are you letting define you? Is it true? You are a child of the King!

In a discussion with dear friends, margin was the topic. Margin is the difference between load and power; where Power is energy, skills, time, training, emotional and physical strength, faith, finances and relational support and load is represented by work, problems, obligations, commitments, debt, deadlines, interpersonal conflict, etc. Margin is the amount allowed beyond that which is needed. "Marginless is not having time to finish the book you’re reading on stress; margin is having the time to read it twice.” (Richard A. Swenson, The Overload Syndrome, 1998 and Margin, 2004.) Marginless is is wondering if anyone has seems a robin. Margin is listening and seeing the spring birds migrate north.
Contemplating, discussing and analyzing margin, I begin to think different people are wired to need different amounts of margin. I think my body needs more margin than most.

For the grace of God has appeared, bringing salvation for all people, training us to renounce ungodliness and worldly passions, and to live self-controlled, upright, and godly lives in the present age, waiting for our blessed hope the appearing of the glory of our great God and Savior Jesus Christ...Titus 2:11-13

Maintaining margin seems to be an example of living the self-controlled, upright and godly life that Paul instructs Titus. Dr. Richard Swenson shares some steps to attaining margin in your life:

Save the spaces in life for what really matters
Plan for the unexpected
Be intentional
Say no to non-priorities
Tame TV and technology
Periodically disconnect; control interruptions
Nourish relationships
Stop the hustle, slow the pace
Use the gift God gives for enjoyment (free time)
Define and defend your boundaries

My week reiterated this discussion with friends. My load was fruit basket upset. No school Monday, therefore fun times but my load was increased without an increase in power supply (time). However, so reassured, our family Tuesday morning devotion reassured me that God always directs our steps. My "hiccups" or surprises are never a surprise to Him, they are part of His plan to transform me and use me. This same morning was full of meetings and commitments followed by a call from the school nurse. Wednesday was a high fever and numerous plan Bs curtailing un"necessary" trips to the grocery store and errands. Thursday was having a day of well-children, away from home all day and envisioning the catch-up that would have to wait until Friday. And Friday morning longing for some rest and reprieve (margin), God stopped me in the creation story. Every day God used to create earth is summed up, "And there was evening and there was morning, the ___ day." Evening comes first. The dark. The time of rest and replenishment. Then comes the day. Again, I hear God telling me His rest comes before the activity. This is when I resolve to spend the beginning of my Friday resting in Him. Not running the errands that have been waiting since Tuesday. Not going on a run. Not cleaning the house. But curling up for at least an hour with my coffee, Bible and maybe my writing to rest in Him. Then the day will come and make time enough for all the items that need me.
Not thirty-minutes later, "My head hurts and my tummy hurts." Oh, those viruses are contagious? Of course, sisters share everything. So again, God directs my day and I believe He directs me to trust in His provision, His timing and His rest. Yes, there will be items I can't check off my list (anything having to do with leaving the house) but there will be margin, time. And that's when my ailing little golden head says, "Mom come quick, look at that bird." Two red-necked male finch perch on the deck railing. In His time, in His way, He's teaching me margin and rest.
How much margin do you need? How much rest do you need? How is God methodically arranging your day to create both rest and margin? Will you choose to trust His perfect timing?