One

How much do you really remember from your wedding day? It's typically a blur of events that whizzes past. I do remember a few distinct things. One of them is the way the pastor took our wedding rings, laid them in the palm of his hand and then bounced them lightly up and down until they nestled almost completely inside one another. A picture of husband and wife becoming one in Christ.
Fourteen years later, I would more fully understand how that is accomplished.

Indeed, I count everything as loss because of the surpassing worth of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord. For His sake I have suffered the loss of all things and count them as rubbish, in order that I may gain Christ and be found in Him...Philippians 3:8-9

Everything else but Jesus is worthless to me, I want more Jesus and to "become one with Him," (from the New Living Translation) like the wedding rings nestled together. This means to understand Jesus by inquiry, thought, examination, observation, practice and experience. By these means, my life becomes increasingly encompassed by His. Jesus' thoughts are my thoughts. My daily aim is to be a bit more like Him every day. Nothing else matters as much as becoming nestled in His presence, becoming one with Christ. And as I become increasingly one with Him or am found in Him, this word also implies that I find myself; who I was created to be.
What would it look like in the church, in our marriages and families if each individual was becoming one with Christ? If we were all becoming conformed, changed into the same Jesus Christ? We'd truly have the same mind, same love, and mind:

...complete my joy by being of the same mind, having the same love, being in full accord and of one mind. Philippians 2:2

When we individually focus on being found in Jesus, becoming like Jesus, collectively we become united. We have the same mind and love: Jesus' mind and Jesus' love.
Flip back another chapter in Philippians.

Only let your manner of life be worthy of the gospel of Christ, so that whether I come and see you or am absent, I may hear of you that you are standing firm in one spirit, with one mind striving side by side for the faith of the gospel, Philippians 1:27

Paul's letter to the church in Philippi, written from prison, calls them to keep advancing the gospel and to gain momentum for the task by being transformed into Christ's image and becoming one Church. The more each Philippian became like Jesus, the more united the Church would be and the more effectively they would spread the gospel message. When we are each individually becoming surrounded by Jesus, one with Him; we're a unified team of little Christs in a dark world that desperately needs His light.
Are you being surrounded by Jesus a little more each day? What step will you take today to bounce your ring just a little and settle into Jesus' ring? You can not push anyone else into His ring but set an example by your own lifestyle. Unity begins with you.

Write

Indulge me. I've just been prayed over by a Nigerian momma in broken English and her native tongue, and celebrated my 23-year old Nigerian immigrant neighbor securing her first job. My first reaction: write this moment down.

Since obtaining Social Security documents to work in the United States a month ago, I've listened to her apply for numerous jobs, transportation consistently the obstacle in the interview stage. Less than a week ago, she asked, "C-H-I-P-O-L-T-E, you know the place in Apple Valley?" I agreed to drive her to the interview. Then the second interview. Then the third. Every journey, leery of serving and loving in a non-beneficial way.Yet between my ears reverberate, Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as if working for the Lord, not men (Colossians 3:23), and Your labor in the Lord is not in vain (1 Corinthians 15:58).  

And now the celebration and unexpected blessing. I feel affirmed and in the center of His will for my days. I'm thankful to write. The opportunity to look back and recall His hand.

I will bless the Lord who guides me;  even at night my heart instructs me. I know the Lord is always with me. I will not be shaken, for he is right beside me. Psalm 16:7-8

Record the Lord's guidance and instruction in your life.

Compelled

Lying in bed. It's four o'clock in the morning. I can't fall back to sleep. My mind begins. If I wake up now, I'd have plenty of time to study the Bible, finish that chapter, write in my blog, enjoy coffee, get a good workout… Golly I hope I don't fall back to sleep, that sounds like fun.
We are simply compelled to do some things. (Things that seems crazy to others.) 

 For preaching the Good News is not something I can boast about. I am compelled by God to do it. How terrible for me if I didn’t do it. (1 Corinthians 9:16, NLT)

Paul is compelled to preach the gospel. It’s the passion God gave him and it keeps him up at night. It is not his own will, but God's design for his life. To not preach for Paul would have been to live his life in vain or emptiness because he’s not accomplishing God’s intended purpose for his life

Suddenly, at 6:04 in the morning, I understood that word. I am compelled to wake up early. I jokingly call it "my own time." But maybe it's a God-given compulsion. It equips me and seriously, "woe to me" if I don't take it. (And woe to my family as well.)
God-given compulsions will always align with God's Word and will likely be an act of love, service or relationship.
There are other things we're compelled to do. Friends who felt compelled to sell everything they own, pack up their families and fly across the globe to share Jesus by building relationships with those in other countries. Sometimes we're compelled for the long-term missions. Sometimes we're compelled for the short-term missions: a ten-day mission trip, filling shoe-boxes for Operation Christmas Child, bless someone financially, or encourage someone with a phone call or note... When your compulsion is God given, it doesn't just go away after a good-night's sleep. It'll wake you in the middle of the night, keep you up at night or wake you before long before the sunrise. Better to act on your compulsion: your God-given mission. To step out in faith and trust for God's provision and act! This is what God's designed you for.

For we are His workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand, that we should walk in them. Ephesians 2:10

What are you compelled to do? What steps of faithfulness will you take today to answer God's work designed for your life? The reward will be exhilarating: when God says to you, "Well, done my good and faithful servant."

Nets

"Follow me, and I will make you become fishers of men." And immediately they left their nets and followed him. Mark 1:17

 The ESV adds become in its translation, indicating an future process of change or growing. The disciples weren't yet fishers of men, but would be transformed into what Jesus' will was for them and Jesus would do the work (I will make). Jesus did the fashioning, molding or transforming in his disciples in New Testament times and is molding you and me now if we follow him. Our action of following comes first.

And immediately Jesus left the synagogue and entered the house of Simon and Andrew, with James and John. Now Simon's mother-in-law lay ill with a fever, and immediately they told him about her. And he came and took her by the hand and lifted her up, and the fever left her, and she began to serve them. Mark 10:29-31

Simon had a mother-in-law, so we infer that he was married. Simon left more that just his nets, to follow Jesus; he left his family for a time (or maybe his family followed Jesus and his disciples.) This rocked me. If Jesus calls the engineer to do a completely time-consuming ministry in which Jesus would work through him and the engineer had to leave our family for days and weeks to become what Jesus intends, I would have a really hard time accepting God's will. I have always held tightly to keeping family before or above ministry on the priority list. This revelation of family in Scripture reminds me to hold loosely. However, I am comforted: Jesus showed up at Simon's house and healed Simon's mother-in-law. Jesus cares about families and will take care of them, providing for all their needs. I'm sure he'd do this even if Jesus hadn't physically walked into the home. He is an omnipresent God. I wonder what the perspective would be from Simon's wife. How many stories would she have of how God provided, cared and healed their family while she was "holding down the fort" during Simon's following?
A day after my pondering, the blue Jays moved in. In my office, I look out a window overlooking the boisterous one's rainbow flower garden. At first I noticed just one blue jay, then realized it was a whole flock. I had never noticed a blue jay in my yard prior to this, so it really grabbed my attention. I wondered why they had moved in and then I recalled the sunflowers she had planted. Food: the blue jays were after the sunflower seeds. Remember that movie, Field of Dreams and that famous voice in the corn field: "If you build it, they will come," ? Suddenly in my head is the phrase, "If you feed them, they will come."
Mark chapter one: fishers of men. If you feed them (literally as Jesus did feed the 5000+ and then 4000+ and figuratively feeding spiritually), they will come. Read through any gospel account, people flocked to him! When they follow, God's Word and Holy Spirit will do the work to transform them.
In the middle of preparing my teaching on 1 Corinthians 3, I see the parallel. Our class membership attendance has fallen from last year. But if follow (and leave my nets) he will make me become fisher of men. And if I feed them, they will come.
Since my calling, I've had the hardest time leaving my nets: my family. Just a day prior, the boisterous one ran off the school bus and asked, "You're coming to my fall walk, aren't you?" In fact, I had not volunteered for this field trip. Intentionally, this was an act of leaving my net. And even now as I work on my teaching, watching the blue jays, her look of devastation rips my heart in two. I know I'm called to teach right now but I'm feeling guilting about "leaving" my family. Knowing I'm following Him, I press on in my study and preparation.
A while later, I indulge in the last piece of Dove dark chocolate from Valentine's Day. (It is fall but, chocolate keeps, right?) I don't believe in horoscopes but I do believe God speaks to us in sometimes bizarre ways. Inside the chocolate foil is a message: "You are exactly where you are suppose to be." Not on a field trip, but parked in God's Word preparing for teaching. So I resolve to do the work God has called me to for this season and allow him to provide and care for my family as I follow.

"For we are His workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand, that we should walk in them." Ephesians 4:10

You have a mission you are called to for Christ. What is your "net" right now? Practice flexing your trust muscles and leave your "net" to walk following Him.

Too much

Making a "chore" fun, I asked the compassionate one to resurrect all the fall decorations and tuck away the summer ones. The next day, as I settle in for some drip time, my attention falls upon the mantle: a mix of summer and fall and entirely too much. I chuckle and then I realize. I realize that sometime our schedules are just too much.

Sometimes we need to say, "no," but to what? I make a quick list of my commitments. Which of these need a no? They're all good. Which ones on the list won't last? Which ones can I come back to later? 

It's so difficult to put away good, valuable and worthwhile tasks and commitments. As I look at my favorite spring tulips (silk flowers, embarassingly a favorite) and recall that if I put them away for a season or two, when I find them again in March, they look more lovely.
What if I took something off my schedule for just a season? Would it appear more precious when it returned? 

For everything there is a season, and a time for every matter under heaven:
a time to be born, and a time to die;
a time to plant, and a time to pluck up what is planted;
a time to kill, and a time to heal;
a time to break down, and a time to build up;
a time to weep, and a time to laugh;
a time to mourn, and a time to laugh;
a time to cast away stones, and a time to gather stones together;
a time to embrace, and a time to refrain from embracing;
a time to seek, and a time to lose;
a time to keep, and a time to cast away;
a time to tear, and a time to sew;
a time to keep silence, and a time to speak;
a time to love and a time to hate;
a time for war, and a time for peace.
I perceived that there is nothing better for them than to be joyful and to do good as long as they live; also that everyone should eat and drink and take pleasure in all his toil--this is God's gift to man. Ecclesiastes 3:1-8, 12-13

When our Bible study parts for the summer, it's okay. It's time for a change of pace. But in fall, glancing through the list of names attending and the feel of a new workbook in hand, I can't wait to get started again; God's gift to me. The off-season makes the resuming sweeter.

When the calculating one says, "Mom, I want to read to you," and I begrudgingly snuggle in beside her, I do the task out of discipline, and then my heart is filled with joy. This is God's gift to momma. This is a season that won't last! And so I know that time with my golden heads will not be struck from the list, but that which can wait will. It is a constant prioritization.

And whatever you do, in word or deed, do everything in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him. Colossians 3:17

What do you need to give up, even if just for a season? Make a list of your commitments then talk with God. Consider these questions. Which of these won't last? Which of these brings me joy; is God's gift to me? Which of these need striking?

Ministry

I keep seeing the wedding picture God's painted in my mind. He the bridegroom, the engineer and golden heads the precious bride, and me as Christ's equally treasured best man. Christ completes my joy and He has strategically placed me beside Him in this marriage. Christ must become greater, and I must become less, (John 3:30).
Christ must become greater because He is perfect and I am not. For God's Spirit is constantly in Christ. Yet, because I have chosen to believe in Christ, I was given a seal of truth (John 3:33).
In this instance, seal means to set a mark upon a thing as a token of its authenticity or approvedness that God is true; He is who He says He is and will do what He says He will do. It reminds me of the Dairy REAL seal marked on packages (authentic milk) versus the package of cheese puffs claiming, "made with with real cheese." It's easy to spot a phony and even the calculating one reading this raised her eyebrows in questioning unbelief, really?
When placing my belief in Christ, I got the real seal (or the True seal). And my charge is filter everything through that true seal as well as to echo all I know to be true. Another way of understanding is that when we choose to believe, we are sealed with the Holy Spirit (Ephesians 1:13).The Holy Spirit directs me and teaches me what is true. Just as Christ was controlled by the Spirit, I too can be controlled by the Spirit. However, Christ was CONSTANTLY led by the Spirit, but I must choose to invite or ask the Spirit to rule and influence my life. The same power is available to me if I do invite Him. And it can speak words of life and truth to my beloved family.
My ministry as a mom and wife is to tell them what God teaches me and by God's design, Christ will increase in their lives and I will decrease.
The influence of this encourager, the best man, is undeniable. And I've experienced it first hand. Driving to meet grandma, I was listening to lies: I really am a horrible mother. I don't think the engineer likes me. I'm not a leader. I can't do anything well…. Ready to cry, in the pit of despair, something within tells me these are lies. And then we arrive. I have envisioned seeing her, crying, venting, complaining. And there she is, this special woman, this fellow "best man" to her family's wedding and she smiles while she embraces me. And that is enough. This woman, whose joy is complete in Christ, controlled by the Spirit helps me overcome the lies and spiritual battle in my mind simply through her presence.
Do I do that for my family? A convicting question. An iCal fanatic, I arrange my calendar to reflect that I cherish the bride, my family, but that my joy is completed by the groom, Christ. Now, I must follow the plan.

You make know to me the path of life;
in Your presence there is fullness of joy;
at Your right hand are pleasures forevermore. Psalm 16:11

What wedding picture is set in your mind when you read John 3:29-30? 

According to the gift of God's grace, I was given a ministry achievable only by the working of His power in me. Though I am the very least of all the saints, this ministry was given to tell my family the unsearchable riches of Christ and to bring to light for them what is the plan of the mystery hidden for ages in God who created all things….For this reason, I bow my knees before the Father, from whom every family in heaven and on earth is named, that according to the riches of His glory He may grant my family to be strengthened with power through His Spirit in their inner beings, so that Christ (not me) may dwell in their hearts through faith--that the engineer and golden heads, being rooted and grounded in love, may have strength to comprehend with all the saints what is the breath and length and height and depth, and to know the love of Christ that surpasses knowledge, that they may be filled with all the fullness of God. Ephesians 3:7-9,14-19, my paraphrase

What is your ministry? In that ministry, will you become less so Christ can become greater?

Waters

He sent from on high, He took me;
He drew me out of many waters.
He rescued me from my strong enemy,
from those who hated me,
for they were too mighty for me.
They confronted me in the day of my calamity,
but the Lord was my support.
He brought me out into a broad place;
He rescued me, because He delighted in me. 2 Samuel 22:17-20

When I ponder the oceans of life, I see troubled times, sorrow, hard times and new daunting tasks. I think of Jesus calling Peter out on the water in Matthew 14:28-33. If Peter kept his focus on Jesus, he literally walked on water. When I keep my eyes on Jesus, He will pull me up, just as I am sinking and I can walk on the figurative waters. This past week, called to a new ministry, I found myself in uncharted waters. But I knew Jesus had called me out on the water.
One week ago, I woke in the middle of the night, and a small voice told me, "Isaiah 6." Trying to fall back to sleep, I willed myself to remember Isaiah 6 in the morning. When I woke, I recalled the voice. Why Isaiah? I have read the book of Isaiah before. I'll be honest; I don't like it. I don't understand it. I get lost in its imagery. As I open God's Word to Isaiah 6, I'm struck that it contains Isaiah's encounter and commission from the Lord.
First, Isaiah's encounter with the Lord is a calling to be transparent before Him, exposing sin. The angel touches Isaiah's lips or mouth to forgive his sin and takes away guilt. Interestingly, Isaiah's ministry (and typically our ministry) relied on his mouth (speaking). Then, Isaiah is sent to prophecy. Isaiah's response is, "Here I am, send me!" How could mine be any different? Immediately, I agree, Here I am, but not me, You through me. Speak through me.
In my task this week to teach God's Word, the enemy lurked his head: doubt, a cloudy mind, disrespectful children, silence on the home front. "But the Lord was my support." I've never received so many encouraging words. He supported me through my circumstances physically and through the words of His children to me.
As I rose to deliver my teaching, or rather His teaching, I realized He had brought me to a broad place. Here I was surrounded by people that wanted me to succeed, win, to do a work to which He called me. And why would He allow this? "..because He delighted in me." This blows my mind!
Who am I that He delights in me? I feel inept most of the time! Interestingly Moses asked the same question (Exodus 3:11) when God sent Him to Pharaoh, and David asks God the same question five times. Over a month ago, I journaled a paraphrase of David's response to God's blessing in 2 Samuel 7:18-22,

Who am I, O Lord God, and what is my name and family worth that you have brought me this far? And yet what you've done in my life is so small compared to all you are capable of. You have promised a legacy for all eternity because I am Christ's child. So what else can I say? I am your humble servant! You are great and have promised great, wonderful things. And in your giving you have revealed to me mysteries. You are great and unique, truly no one compares to You!

As I've watched God work mightily in my life this past week, I know it's all Him. And I am on guard, that pride doesn't sneak in, that I fully depend on Him using me. Not myself. My pastor brother-in-law shared a prayer from a book of Puritan Prayers, Valley of Vision,

Destroy in me every lofty thought, 

Break pride to pieces and scatter it to the winds, 

Annihilate each clinging shred of self-righteousness, 

Implant in me true lowliness of spirit, 

Abase me to self-loathing and self-abhorrence,  

Open in me a found of penitential tears, 

Break me, then bind me up; 

Thus will my heart be a prepared dwelling for my God...

Often we find ourselves in more than just one water. As I struggle through parenting and worshiping idols, I feel the wind in the water. Praise God I can recall victories, the broad places, so I can trust while I'm in the other waters.
What waters is He bringing you through right now? Acknowledge that He alone can come from on high and support you. Expect His deliverance, marveling in the fact that He rescues you because delights in you.

Run away

Physically fatigued, driving through heavy snow and traffic, the battle raged in my head. Wipers and defrost on high and struggling to see, Satan echoes in my mind, "You can't do this. You can't even get there. A leader in Bible Study has to live closer and be physically available. You're not committed to this Bible Study, you want to turn around and go home." Lies. Deep inside, I know these are lies but I can't quite shake the doubt that I'm not the right person for this ministry.

Safely arrived and listening to shared insight and revelations from the Lord, Satan taunts again, "You don't know anything compared to everyone else here. You are not qualified to lead. Others are more equipped than you." Struggling to focus on the discussion, I acknowledge these are Satan's lies, and turn my mind to what is true, honorable, right..(Philippians 4:8.) What do we do when the lies we hear contradict what we believe God has told us? Two things: recall and seek again. We prayed about the call to serve in leadership; believers affirmed me, God opened doors, His Word and Spirit affirmed. Still, the doubt. Can you relate? Have you ever pounded your head against the wall saying, I can't do this? The kids are whining and demanding. The deadline has come and gone; your company and personal reputation are on the line. Showtime is in ten minutes and you're not prepared. I can't do this.

Opening my Bible after a good night's rest, I am again amazed at how His mercies are new every morning (Lamentations 3:22-23). This is seeking again.

Seek the Lord and His strength,
Seek His presence continually. 1 Chronicles 16:11

It is not your own strength that can accomplish the tasks to which He calls you. His strength through you is sufficient. Your inadequacies cause you to rely on His strength.

For is who is God except the Lord?
And who is a rock, except our God?
God is my strength and power
and He makes my way perfect. 2 Samuel 22:32

He is solid, dependable and unbreakable. There is no task you cannot face without Him within you. He is within you when you believe in Christ, God's perfect Son sent to earth to offer His life for your wrong doing. You get so much for so little. 

When you accept the roles and position He calls you to, whether it be motherhood, leadership at work, in the community or church, and then obey His commands you will be equipped.

ACCEPT + OBEY = EQUIPPED

After you say "yes" to the road He places before you, comes the obedience. You have to be completely yielded to Him and available for God to work through you. When you experience success, He gets the glory. When you face a road block, you know He will work a miracle and if He doesn't, He's directing you somewhere else. We are all created with a sinful nature. We want our own way. We need Him to remove our heart of stone and give us His heart.

Whatever God calls you to, He wants you to serve Him through that ministry. 

Regard us as servants of Christ and stewards of the mysteries of God. Moreover, it is required of stewards that they be found trustworthy. 1 Corinthians 4:1-2

Merriam-Webster defines a stewards as "a person whose job is to manage the land and property of another person." God trusts you to manage His land and property with the tasks He puts before you. This is your ministry. Do those you minister to also trust you? In Jesus' parable of the talents, the master applauds those who are faithful with a little and rewards them with more to manage (Matthew 25:21, 23).

It seems surreal to me that God has placed in my heart such a deep desire to know Him more and His Word. To wake up in the morning, wondering, "What is He going to teach me today?" This seems unnatural. I would have never imagined myself like this five-years ago. I don't know why God has called me to write. He keeps affirming me in it though through His Spirit, people and circumstances. I felt like the Spirit called me to write every week this year. Discipline is super-natural! I am not super-natural, but Christ in me is. I could runaway from the ministry He has placed before me, but He trusts me to be available to do it through me.

Listen to the song by Waterdeep and let the lyrics be a conversation with God.

I could run away 

But You would never leave 

You would always stay 

Right by my side 

Everything I've ever wanted 

I've found in you 

And I need you, Oh I need you 

Every step of the way